Women complain about the wrong things. Women are too busy trying to impress a man physically, that inner beauty becomes rotten. Women settle. Women make excuses. Women find reasons to stay. Women don’t see the chances to leave, instead all the reasons to hold on to what is not really there. Women ask questions to what they already know the answer to. Women don’t know the difference between knowing better and desperately hoping for better. Women forget that a woman’s intuition is always right.
Women…I am a woman and I’ve made each mistake I’ve listed. I’ve watched myself lose myself and beg myself for forgiveness. Because at the end of the day, I am still learning. And I can say I am still growing. And I am lucky to know that there is nothing wrong with loving the sweet words a man has to say, the little gifts to show he appreciates, the surprising calls on any given night or day, the way he caresses my skin and holds me to stay, and the truth in his “I Love You”s. It is okay. As long as I remember that just because it feels good doesn’t mean it’s all good in a relationship. If I am uncertain or confused, or have doubts and lack trust in a man, I have every right to take time for myself to find out if I am wasting my time or not. Because as women, we rush into things. I am a woman and these things can make a woman forgive a man. But I am blessed. I am a woman able to admit my mistakes and say that I am blessed enough to recognize that I too have lost battles between a man’s game. And being nice, loving, passionate, caring, truthful, honest, and pure isn’t wrong despite the heart breaks.
I am a woman. A woman with the right mind. That knows that despite the glory a man demonstrates I must go out and get all I’ve ever wanted for myself, be hungry for knowledge, dream big and never share too much or too little, cook with passion, do the laundry with love, never lie to myself and always go for what I deserve. Because damn, as cliche as it may sound, I am a damn good woman that deserves a good man.
———Written By: Poetic Tease
We find it so hard to forgive others when we feel a sense of hurt. We forget just how most likely than not, we have done the same to someone else. We dwell on the matter that it has happened to us and we- a union of individuals, continuously disregard that fact that we all want second chances in life. Whether the other person on the other side feels we deserve to be forgiven or not, or the opportunity to show we deserve forgiveness. We emphasize on the pain one has caused us without acknowledging the matter for why it happened or why it was done to us. The cycle that becomes harder to break out of.
I am not saying that all things happen to us because we have deserved it, “it was meant to happen”, or because “it was bound to happen” due to the decisions you as an individual were making for YOURSELF, in YOUR life. No one deserves to be raped or molested, to lose a parent, to lose their house, to become chronically ill, etc. But to forgive the man/woman that killed a love one, for he/she has yet found the beauty of life-for he/she is not really living but dying slowly. To forgive the man/woman or company that fired you for he/she who has now lost a business feels they are left with less than you will ever endure. Forgive the man/woman that rapes someone, for he/she has yet recognized the beauty of having sexual relations with someone who desires it just as bad, as much as you do. I am not saying their wrong doings are to be accepted. But we must learn to forgive. And though hard to forget, put it pass us and learn from the detrimental experience for a better life.
We all want and believe we deserve better in life. We all make mistakes, take the wrong actions and say the wrong things. But we must forgive ourselves, before asking to be forgiven. We must remember that we too know someone who we “know” deep inside has a good heart despite their faults, shameful unethical actions, and spiteful beliefs. And we too, have tried to forgive them, because we knew deep inside “he/she did not know any better”. We must “be the change we want to see in the world”, as best said by the great Mahatma Gandhi. We shall start with the younger ones, with the ones that still have experienced less, heard less, and seen less. Give them what someone did not give you when you were growing up or always “thought you already knew”, so you didn’t listen. And share the importance of learning from mistakes before they happen. Give a child the chance to appreciate someone’s goods, before pointing out their wrongs. And this world may just some day be a better place than you picture it to be.
To believe we deserve forgiveness is to forgive ourselves. And then we will learn that though one may not deserve it at the given moment, we all deserve the chance. One must work hard with willingness, to earn our trust back. Though we shall not make someone feel like they won’t ever be forgiven no matter how hard they try. We must give the opportunity, but not loose respect for ourselves in the midst of humble doings. “The only way to dissolve a bad taste in your mouth is to swallow your pride and savor forgiveness”, as said by the greatness in me.
I am not religious. But I am a firm believer of a higher God. I do not follow what I am told is right. Instead I take it upon myself to evaluate it’s purpose, and determine whether I will or will not decide to agree with. I am not against those who have their certain beliefs, and believe they are scheduled to be right. The fact that someone could be passionate enough to be dedicated on just one outlook on religion does not bother me. For I am not worried of what the next man believes, has faith in, or desires. I am glad that there still exist man kind that has beliefs, has faith and desires.
We live in a hungry world of individuals who indiscreetly become obsessed with either an object, a person, a state of mind, or an idea- to fill space where there lies a deep emptiness in ourselves. But we forget, that in a world of billions there is a world of infinite stars in a Universe that speaks through our, the people’s energy. Those are the ones that bother me. You may call yourself a Christian, and that’s just fine. But don’t talk to me of your beliefs to try and persuade me without giving me the opportunity to choose, to have my own desires, beliefs and opinions. Don’t speak of your God like you are trying to sell me your dream. Instead, make me feel that you know him. That you really feel him. Like you and him have a bond that not even God could make you believe other wise. Than I might just pay attention to you. Make me believe not in what you believe, but that you have build your beliefs through love, faith, care, grace, and hope. Whether your God, my God….there is a God.
I thought to myself…3 reasons why I love the “WE” that we are. Though we are not officially the “WE” defined as a couple- if “WE” really are potentially the “WE” that we both see each other, together, than at this given moment I am in love with you.
1- “WE” are strong believers of living for today. We are making ”tomorrows”, days filled with less worries and feeling more comfortable not becoming too comfortable with each other. “We” are not focused on the past, giving the future an opportunity. We do not hold on to the past too close to our chest, causing clutter. We leave enough room in our heart’s to embrace the present moment, despite our past.
2- But our relationship contains a friendship that’s archival. If I ever wanted to grab into our “love bank” I’d never be afraid of pulling out too much or too little. Never risking the chances of withdrawing things from the past too hard to bare with or too irrelevant. Truth is, the amount I’ve deposited has never felt like I was putting in for a rainy day. Instead, building a fortune of wealth from wisdom, great health, and pure love despite the long list of bank statements that determine all the work put in- which was worth spending together.
3- We both plan on longevity. Whether as my soul mate or friend, whether near or far- you’ll always be here forever. In my heart. Where some how, though both of our hearts have been broken by each other, “every lover needs a heart break, a break from hearts aching” and you where there to mend my heart back together. “We” both understand:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” Corinthians 13:4–8a
**Even though I don’t tell you I don’t trust you with my heart just yet, I trust that you understand just how much I love you. And that’s enough for me to trust myself in loving you. Knowing I won’t loose myself in you. That I won’t regret the things we say or do. That you know better than to confuse my kindness for weakness, my cleverness for ways to manipulate the truth, my passion for attention, my affection for being vulnerable, and my heart for a fool.
I remain nameless.
Creeped behind memories that have never happened,
itching to be told.
Standing behind the flash of a perfect picture,
waiting to be framed in gold.
Standing in line for a ride,
worth risking my heart for.
Dancing to a song that has yet to be composed,
locked behind the unwritten bars,
knocking on love’s door.
I remain shameless.
Living in nightmares that crush my fantasies.
Can you feel the pressure on your chest,
of me sinking in my teeth.
Biting into your heart-
a taste of your bitter sweet.
Can you feel the heat in the passion,
of me holding you in my sleep?
The war between reality vs. my dreams-
ripped between my sheets.
I remain blameless.
I can not be called a fool for my imagination-
that sweet, deep, and tempting crush.
Trapped between the possibilities-
of that uncontrollable, unforgivable, and unpredictable rush.
I can not, and will not surrender,
until I’ve had some and I feel I can not get enough-
of that young thrill for the chase-
in search of that unconditional love.
Written By: Poetic Tease
“I Love You” isn’t a strong like. And should not be used to complete a desperate need for validation and/or recognition. It is simply just, Love. Love, unlike “like” can not be measured. Where there is “like”, there are boundaries, barriers, and limits to the emotions you can put into something or someone that you have to question if worth what you are willing and able to provide.
Where there is love, there may be resistance in order to protect yourself. But when true love is felt, that fear of getting hurt, those walls built high to hide your true feelings, the “what ifs” versus the “why nots”, the past that you call “lessons learned”, will all no longer matter as much.
Even if you get hurt, at least through Love there won’t be regrets. And when those walls come down- all the strength it took to hold them up will feel like you’ve lifted a weight off what crushed your heart down. And when you begin to question your existence with “what ifs” to manipulate the “could’ves, should’ves, would’ves”, ask yourself the “why nots”, what is worth having is worth fighting for.
Don’t pretend to love someone or something because of how good it feels. At times, the one you argue with is not a potential enemy but a great challenge. Fighting for what you want, requires perseverance. Getting what you want, requires being true to yourself. We’ve always been told growing up, “what you give is what you get”. And growing up we don’t understand it much until we get older and we find the pleasure in hard work, in never giving up, in being kind to others, and earning your respect.
You may not always receive what you give at the moment. But good deeds do not go unnoticed, noble words do not go forgotten, and truth is always appreciated. So when you feel the passion has become forced, devotions are not pure but a false requirement to please, then simply walk away with what is left of the good.
The next time you tell someone the small phrase where so much passion, pure effort, willingness, truth, and happiness comes from truly ask yourself if you Love them. The next time you tell yourself you love some thing, ask yourself do you give it your all and more, and if you would fail would you try again or give up.
The Love Luminaries all agreed that the heart is the central access point for our experience of Love for No Reason. Not our flesh-and-blood heart but our spiritual heart—the place in the middle of our chest we point to when we indicate who we are. In all cultures throughout history, the heart has been considered the seat of love.
The ocean of Higher Love flows into your life through this portal, and the more open you keep your heart, the healthier, happier, and more loving you are. It’s the key to succeeding at your life’s job: expanding your ability to love.
That’s why keeping the heart open is the goal of all the practices, tools, and techniques in the Love for No Reason program that you’ll learn in Part II.
These three themes are the bottom line—the CliffsNotes of the information I discovered in my research—and the foundation upon which this book is built. Keep them in mind as you continue to read. They are the mantras of Love for No Reason.
excerpt from “An Invitation to Higher Love” book: Love for No Reason
Why are you alive? The Love Luminaries say that our ultimate purpose is to grow in our ability to give and receive love. In other words, love is our job here on earth!
So if love is your job description, the most important thing you can do is to find that ocean of love within you and bring it to the world—to yourself, to your loved ones, to strangers you pass in the street, to everyone and everything.
Now that doesn’t mean standing on a street corner with a sign that says Free Hugs (although that might be fun!). What it means is that you live your life in a context of love, seeing that everything that happens to you is to help you expand your ability to love. It’s easy to love things that are charming and attractive, but the real challenge is to experience love in difficult situations and with people you don’t even like. To maintain an open heart when your spouse is being difficult, your child is throwing a tantrum, or your boss is making what seem like unreasonable demands requires a commitment to love as the number one priority in your life.
In fact, all the accounts I’ve read about near-death experiences point to the importance of focusing on love. Many people say that at the end of our lives there’s a life review during which our souls are asked only two questions: How well did you learn your life lessons? And how much did you love?
If that’s going to be our life’s final exam, maybe it’s a good idea to prepare now to answer those questions well. I don’t think this is the kind of test you can cram for at the end!
excerpt from “An Invitation to Higher Love” book: Love for No Reason
All the Love Luminaries told me that love isn’t just something we feel for others, it’s who we are. Love is actually the substance, the building blocks, the essence of everything in our lives. We’re made up of love. Our molecules are formed from love. We are love.
I know that when I first heard this, I rolled my eyes, thinking, I’ve heard this all before. But at the same time I realized, I have no idea what that really means.
We think of love as a stream of emotion flowing between two points—between us and whatever we love. But in fact, love is more like an ocean that’s inside and all around us.
We walk around with our little cups, begging for a few drops of love from others, when actually we’re the huge ocean of love. This is why I say that when you experience Love for No Reason on an ongoing basis, you stop being a “love beggar” and become a “love philanthropist.”Instead of looking at every interaction as a potential source of love—something to fill you up and make you feel good—you come to every interaction radiating love. You’re overflowing with love because you are the source!
Having great relationships doesn’t depend on finding the right person or circumstance; it depends completely on your capacity to love. Unconditional love for others is based on “being the ocean of love.”
Experiencing that you are love is the ultimate form of self-love. It’s not love of your small self—your personality. It’s not about loving yourself because you look good or you did a great job or because you’ve gained a certain status. It’s the love of your big Self—your essence. It’s the love that comes from waking up to who you truly are.
excerpt from “An Invitation to Higher Love” book:Love for No Reason
This isn’t just a nice idea. As I discovered in my research, some people are actually living this way. After each interview with a Love Luminary, I would shake my head in wonder. The accounts of living in Love for No Reason were far better than any fairy tale—because they were true. For some the experience of this expansive state came on dramatically and suddenly—in a moment of grace—while for others it was a more subtle and gradual process.
One beautiful example of someone who experienced a moment of grace that changed her life came from Love Luminary Mirabai Devi, an international spiritual teacher from South Africa I interviewed while she was teaching in California.
Her experience of this pure state of love first happened almost twenty years ago, when as a young woman traveling through Europe on her own, Mirabai had an awakening:
It was as if a dam burst in my heart, and the waters overflowed. The love that came forth was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. Like a flood, it was all-consuming and all-encompassing; I could hardly contain it. I felt electrified; my body was tingling all over. I was so in love with the whole creation that I wanted to hug everyone I met. I knew that I couldn’t do that because people would think I was crazy. Still, people could feel it. Everywhere I went they would just come up to me and say, “What can I do for you?” “Can I help you?” “Can I give you a ride?” “Can I get you some food?” “Can I … ?” They just wanted to be around me.
All I wanted to do was make humanity feel how loved it was. To let them know that this love was everywhere, and available to everyone. Nonstop I just sent it out to all people, all beings, and all life forms. I sent it to all those who were suffering.
Traveling through Holland one afternoon, I stopped on the side of the road and looked at a field of cabbages. All the cabbages were filled with this iridescent, luminous light. My heart was bursting with love for the cabbages.
I felt union with the whole creation. Everything was the creation of love. Everything was pulsing with love. It was everywhere, in everything. It was in the walls and in the trees. It was as though it was coming through the sky.
I saw that everything is connected and everything is one. And everything is radiant with this exquisite, ecstatic love.
That was the beginning of Mirabai’s experience of living in an ongoing state of Love for No Reason. Today she travels around the world, speaking and teaching others about love.
In interview after interview, I heard more than a hundred variations on this theme. I thought, If so many people, from all different backgrounds and all different walks of life, experience this, it must be possible for me and anyone else.
My question became: How did this awakening of love happen for Mirabai and the others? And what are the conditions that you and I can set up to invite this experience of love into our own lives?
excerpt from “An Invitation to Higher Love” book: Love for No Reason
What a small word for such an enormous, expansive, exalted experience!
Since the dawn of civilization, humans have been engaged in the pursuit of love. Monuments have been constructed, fortunes made, and treasuries emptied—all in the name of love. Whatever we think we want—more clothes, more friends, more money, more status, more power, more anything—in the end, it boils down to love.
When love flows in our lives, it opens our hearts, our arms, our eyes. We blossom, like a flower in the springtime sun. When love is missing, we wither and close, protecting ourselves against the harshness of life.
Imagine being so full of love that no matter how much you gave, there was always more than enough, and any love you received was just icing on the cake.
Every spiritual tradition tells us to love one another, and we’d all like to do just that. So, what’s the problem?
In a nutshell, we’re handicapped in the love department—both giving and receiving—because we’re disconnected from the state of Love for No Reason, the source of love inside us.
When you learn how to access that huge internal reservoir of love, instead of looking for love outside yourself, you’re able to bring love to every situation. And that’s when your life becomes magical—a whole lot juicier and more fulfilling.
excerpt from “An Invitation to Higher Love” book: Love for No Reason
Take it from a guy: If you’re in love with somebody, you will swim the stream, you will climb the mountain, you will slay the dragon. You’re going to get to her somehow, some way.
Dr. Phil (via simply-quotes)
AGAIN please emphasize “IF YOU’RE IN LOVE WITH SOMEBODY…” IF he is not, he won’t go that far. SO WOMEN stop stressing yourself over it.