I am not religious. But I am a firm believer of a higher God. I do not follow what I am told is right. Instead I take it upon myself to evaluate it’s purpose, and determine whether I will or will not decide to agree with. I am not against those who have their certain beliefs, and believe they are scheduled to be right. The fact that someone could be passionate enough to be dedicated on just one outlook on religion does not bother me. For I am not worried of what the next man believes, has faith in, or desires. I am glad that there still exist man kind that has beliefs, has faith and desires.
We live in a hungry world of individuals who indiscreetly become obsessed with either an object, a person, a state of mind, or an idea- to fill space where there lies a deep emptiness in ourselves. But we forget, that in a world of billions there is a world of infinite stars in a Universe that speaks through our, the people’s energy. Those are the ones that bother me. You may call yourself a Christian, and that’s just fine. But don’t talk to me of your beliefs to try and persuade me without giving me the opportunity to choose, to have my own desires, beliefs and opinions. Don’t speak of your God like you are trying to sell me your dream. Instead, make me feel that you know him. That you really feel him. Like you and him have a bond that not even God could make you believe other wise. Than I might just pay attention to you. Make me believe not in what you believe, but that you have build your beliefs through love, faith, care, grace, and hope. Whether your God, my God….there is a God.
I thought to myself…3 reasons why I love the “WE” that we are. Though we are not officially the "WE" defined as a couple- if "WE" really are potentially the "WE" that we both see each other, together, than at this given moment I am in love with you.
1- "WE" are strong believers of living for today. We are making ”tomorrows”, days filled with less worries and feeling more comfortable not becoming too comfortable with each other. "We" are not focused on the past, giving the future an opportunity. We do not hold on to the past too close to our chest, causing clutter. We leave enough room in our heart’s to embrace the present moment, despite our past.
2- But our relationship contains a friendship that’s archival. If I ever wanted to grab into our “love bank” I’d never be afraid of pulling out too much or too little. Never risking the chances of withdrawing things from the past too hard to bare with or too irrelevant. Truth is, the amount I’ve deposited has never felt like I was putting in for a rainy day. Instead, building a fortune of wealth from wisdom, great health, and pure love despite the long list of bank statements that determine all the work put in- which was worth spending together.
3- We both plan on longevity. Whether as my soul mate or friend, whether near or far- you’ll always be here forever. In my heart. Where some how, though both of our hearts have been broken by each other, “every lover needs a heart break, a break from hearts aching” and you where there to mend my heart back together. “We” both understand:
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."Corinthians 13:4–8a
**Even though I don’t tell you I don’t trust you with my heart just yet, I trust that you understand just how much I love you. And that’s enough for me to trust myself in loving you. Knowing I won’t loose myself in you. That I won’t regret the things we say or do. That you know better than to confuse my kindness for weakness, my cleverness for ways to manipulate the truth, my passion for attention, my affection for being vulnerable, and my heart for a fool.
“Nobody wants to be themselves… If there was a guy who just liked being himself and didn’t want to be anyone else, that guy would be the most different guy in the world and everybody would want to be him.”—Donald Miller
“People work too hard to figure out the meaning of their lives. Why me, why now. The truth is, sometimes things don’t happen to you for a reason. Sometimes it’s just about being in the right place at the right time for someone else.”—Jodi Picoult (via creatingaquietmind)
“I had never done anything that took my own breath away, and I suppose now that was part of the problem—my chronic inability to astonish myself. I promise you, no one judges me more harshly than I do myself.”—Sue Monk Kidd, The Mermaid Chair (via simply-quotes)
“The deepest secret is that life is not a process of discovery, but a process of creation. You are not discovering yourself, but creating yourself anew. Seek, therefore, not to find out Who You Are, seek to determine Who You Want to Be.”—from "Conversations with God" by Neale Donald Walsch
hmmm nevermind I just answered my own question I wasn't sure if Poetic Tease was you but i just read your about me >.< I love everything I've read so far i can feel where you're coming from on some things and i love how your straight up with your writing (: <3
Truth is… I am jealous of her. The way her presence alone, makes his frowns turn upside down. He caresses her. With his finger tips he spreads her apart, and even if I wanted to interrupt, I would be too afraid to make a sound. He looks into her. Green eyes that never leave his side. And he inhales so profound. Gently, I watch him as he lays her down. He prefers her. I watch his tongue meet her sides, to keep her tight, and he rolls her around. I just close my eyes, and imagine I am the only one for now. He makes love to her. And just like when we do, I watch him smile, inhale, exhale, and count down the minutes to the next round.
She doesn’t speak, or fight to understand, like me. She doesn’t stay around forever; she comes around and leaves. She opens up and spreads her inner beauty, sharing her identity. She makes it difficult for him to breathe normally. She shortens the expansion of his memory. Making him think that she is a necessity, a dependent, and a routine. And even though he loves me dearly, I open my eyes and face reality. She is still there killing him slowly, and I can’t count on eternity.
I am jealous of her. A plant that grows beautifully. The hazy trees that cloud my memories. Another day, another call is made, And he gets his daily dose of medicine, unfortunately. I am the middle man, the third wheel, in this catastrophe of feeling lonely. Word around the streets is, that she eases a lot of lonely hearts, and takes you to a world that has no worries. When will I get the opportunity? To comfort the man that is my addiction, dose of happiness, and comforts me, like she does he? I am not asking you to leave weed. Just asking to love me, more than you love her, and let me take you higher than she can, on a daily; what’s the possibility?
"I Love You" isn’t a strong like. And should not be used to complete a desperate need for validation and/or recognition. It is simply just, Love. Love, unlike "like" can not be measured. Where there is "like", there are boundaries, barriers, and limits to the emotions you can put into something or someone that you have to question if worth what you are willing and able to provide.
Where there is love, there may be resistance in order to protect yourself. But when true love is felt, that fear of getting hurt, those walls built high to hide your true feelings, the “what ifs” versus the “why nots”, the past that you call “lessons learned”, will all no longer matter as much.
Even if you get hurt, at least through Love there won’t be regrets. And when those walls come down- all the strength it took to hold them up will feel like you’ve lifted a weight off what crushed your heart down. And when you begin to question your existence with “what ifs” to manipulate the “could’ves, should’ves, would’ves”, ask yourself the “why nots”, what is worth having is worth fighting for.
Don’t pretend to love someone or something because of how good it feels. At times, the one you argue with is not a potential enemy but a great challenge. Fighting for what you want, requires perseverance. Getting what you want, requires being true to yourself. We’ve always been told growing up, “what you give is what you get”. And growing up we don’t understand it much until we get older and we find the pleasure in hard work, in never giving up, in being kind to others, and earning your respect.
You may not always receive what you give at the moment. But good deeds do not go unnoticed, noble words do not go forgotten, and truth is always appreciated. So when you feel the passion has become forced, devotions are not pure but a false requirement to please, then simply walk away with what is left of the good.
The next time you tell someone the small phrase where so much passion, pure effort, willingness, truth, and happiness comes from truly ask yourself if you Love them. The next time you tell yourself you love some thing, ask yourself do you give it your all and more, and if you would fail would you try again or give up.